Whose Season Do I Ruin This Time?

Since my sports predictions seem to always be way off, I freely admit that whoever I pick to win the Super Bowl this football season should quiver with fear because I will be putting the Planet Dre Whammy on them! Hey, I should have that trademarked. Anyway, here's my call for the Super Bowl in five months:

New England over Tampa Bay (in a rout, obviously)

I really do not like the "elite" teams in the NFC. Dallas has proven that they have no idea how to win big games, specifically that QB Tony Romo. The World champion New York Giants haven't proven that they know how to win big games at home. I don't think they can rely on having every playoff game on the road again. I bet if they had even one playoff game at home, QB Eli Manning would have thrown up before the game and they would have never made it to the Super Bowl. The only other NFC team I like even a little is Minnesota. No one runs the ball and stops the run on defense like those guys. But I'm not picking a team led by Tarvaris Jackson at QB to make the Super Bowl. Someone in the playoffs will find a way to slow down the Vikings run game, and when they do, it will be up to Tarvaris Jackson to win the game with his arm, and that ain't happening. So I'll pick old man Jeff Garcia and his creaky band of veteran brothers in Tampa to find a way into the Super Bowl, racking up boring 17-13 wins along the way, putting the television audience to sleep all at once. The running game is solid with the underrated Earnest Graham, the passing game is just barely good enough with 91-year-old WR Joey Galloway and whoever else they can dig up, and Garcia at QB is wily enough to not make mistakes with the football and let his defense make the impact plays. In the AFC, it's gonna be wild. Just sit back and enjoy the war. San Diego, Pittsburgh, Indianapolis, Jacksonville, New England--all teams that can claim that they are better than anyone in the NFC, and they won't get too much of an argument. I predict that after a long, grueling regular season in which New England gets beat so many times that they are in jeopardy of not making the playoffs, the Patriots wake up the morning of the playoffs, cry in their pillows at the bad memories that flood back from their last playoff game last season--where they somehow lost to the Giants in the Super Bowl--and get up with a burning passion to destroy anyone who dares challenge them this time around. I've seen it happen too many times where a team suffers a devastating loss in the playoffs and uses that experience to band together and win it all the next season. I say the Patriots do just that this time. They won't have any silly perfect season pressure on them, nor will they be running up the scores and setting all-time records. They're just going to storm the field and win every playoff game by an average of three touchdowns. And as for the Super Bowl, they will beat the Buccaneers by at least 24 points.